Tuesday, 5 June 2012

Loverly Jubilley


Well I suppose a lot of you are out there being all British and having barbecues and ‘lovin’ it’ aren’t you?

As the storm clouds gather above me on this fateful anniversary I am reminded only of the futility of our existence. Minions and plebians gather in public grounds, eating cold, sugared fat in a cone and waving a 300 year old symbol of a dead empire, whilst I sit in a sweaty pool of my own misery.

“Why are you doing that you weirdo?” I hear you ask ever so politely.

a dark and sinister ritual
Well because it is on this day that we witness, once again, an event which reminds us only of the time passing swiftly under our withered toes. We cling, like desperate rats, to our youthful faces, sagging under the weight of our own mortality and we blunder onwards down the same road towards our inevitable end.

How do we acknowledge this dreadful loss?

Why the only way we can, the only way we have been shown, the only way we know how!

We make sacrifices and burn farm animals in suburban gardens during a frenzied bacchic celebration watched over by the mysterious Dr Oetker and his decidedly sinister muffin pyramid.

Still, it’s always nice to have a day off.

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